Cancer, surgery, more cancer, more surgery

Ok, it's been way too long since I posted. We've been so busy it's not funny. Of course I posted when I was in Topeka about the ice storm and being stuck and then we went right from Topeka to our appointment in Oklahoma City (4th), then home and I started babysitting on Monday (8th) and then we had a very last minute trip to Oklahoma City again this past week when our new Dr wanted to do another biopsy on Scott's eyelid and that happened on Friday (12th). Wow! What a crazy couple of weeks. And just before that was Christmas which can get to be hectic just in itself. Ok, I bet everyone wants details about the surgery and how things went. I'll start from the beginning and then when I'm at the end....I'll stop. (I kind of stole that from a line out of Disney's Alice in Wonderland...hehe). Here goes:

Ok, at our last appointment in December (can't remember the date) we went to see a new doctor, a plastic surgeon, because Dr. Chodosh wanted to get another biopsy of Scott's eyelid and wanted the plastic surgeon to do it. We were kind of discouraged after that appointment because we felt like they didn't know what they were doing and well, we were just frustrated that we still weren't done with the cancer. Then we went in on the 4th of January and the Dr's knew more of what they wanted to do. The plastic surgeon (I won't type his name because I can't spell it) told us that we had two options with getting the tissue for the biopsy. He was going to either take the whole lesion or just take a "cookie cutter" and cut out circles of tissue to send in. Each one was going to have it's risks. If they took out the whole thing they had to go deep enough into the tissue of the eyelid that Scott would have to have reconstruction done and the function would probably never be the same. If he took out the circles then what if the cancer seeded deeper into the eyelid, would the chances of the cancer be greater? What if they took out the whole thing, messed up the function and then it turned out not to be cancer? But what if it was? Which risks were better to take? We were given until the 10th to decide what we wanted to do. We chatted with our families and got their opinions. Then we took what they said and came up with more questions for the Dr. (by the way our families wanted us to get the whole thing out whether it was cancer or not). We called both Dr's and talked again with them on the 8th and 9th. We were also told that we had to make a quick decision because there was an open surgery time on Friday (12th). We finally made our decision and told him to take the circles out for the biopsy. So on we went back down to OKC.

Scott's surgery went very well. We had to be there at 7:45 and surgery was at 9:00. It was a shorter surgery than the last one and they didn't put him out completely. He was just really drugged up and was half in and out. He was able to talk to them and they were able to talk to him. But I had a God moment in the waiting room while I was there. I won't tell you that story yet, but I will blog about it next time. It was so cool. But anyway, he got out of surgery at about 9:45 and we were able to leave about 10:00 or 10:15. The only bad thing about having the surgery when we did was that there was an ice storm going through OKC that started on Thursday night went on Friday and didn't let up until this morning (Saturday) We left anyway to come home and went through the 2nd one that was heading their way and made it home before the third one, which is supposed to hit tomorrow (Sunday). I guess that's the price you pay when you have cancer (or the possibility of more). We will find out this next week whether it is cancer or not in the eyelid. If it's not than we are done for now unless it comes back. But if it is, we look at another surgery for sure to take out the whole thing (which will ruin the eyelid) and I don't know if they will do the reconstruction during that surgery or have another surgery later. But if that happens Scott's eye will never look the same. I will accept it because it means the cancer will be gone, but his eyes are so beautiful (am I allowed to say that about a guys eyes?) that I might be a little sad. So now we are back to the familiar game of "Wait and See." We go back for sure on the 22nd of January to see the plastic surgeon and then to see Dr. Chodosh on February 13th. Oh, I want it to be over so bad. Then there's always the thought that the cancer has already spread and is just waiting to show it's ugly face. We were told that it could be somewhere else and just waiting to show up at a later time. I really hope not. But I guess we deal with it if it happens.

What kind of stinks right now is that I seem to get stressed out about all the trips, the thought of the cancer taking my husband, and other things, and when I'm stressed I tend to eat more and that does not work when you are trying to lose weight. I'm not one of those that loses weight when stressed or nervous, I eat and gain weight. Plus, being gone so much doesn't help me develop an exercise schedule. Ok, this should be the last thing on my mind while fighting cancer with my husband, but I just can't help it. I want to lose the weight for him, so he can have a better looking wife. Well, that's all all for now, but I'll blog in the next day or so and tell you my God story from the waiting room.