I have to say a public thank you. I have a wonderful friend who just happens to be my sister (in-law). I was down and out and she brought to my attention that I was wrong in my thinking. She loves me enough to be honest with me, yet do it in a kind and gentle way. I can't wait to see how she is with the baby, because I know she will make the bestest mommy in the whole world. I miss her so much and I wish that she lived closer to us, but I would never wish her to be anywhere than where she is, because she is happily married (to my wonderful brother) and having a great time in Topeka. I've realized that family is so important. You can't shut them out just because you feel a certain way. They won't know how you are feeling unless you let them know. It's all about communication. Whether it's your spouse or a mom or dad or sister or brother. You can't keep it all bottled inside. Not only is it good for them (family) to know, but it's good so you don't keep it to yourself and suffer more than you have to. I guess I still have a lot to learn when it comes to living life. It's so hard....but then again, God never promised us it would be easy. I have to remember that God has a plan for my life and it is a good and wonderful plan. It's better than I could ever imagine, even if it's different than what I think it should be. I should be remembering this verse:
"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'"
It goes on from there and says some more wonderful things, but even if I just remember that part of the scripture it's a great promise for me.....for everyone. Because God doesn't just have plans for me, but for everyone. He never makes mistakes, His will is perfect as long as we follow Him. Now I'm not saying I won't have days that I forget this. I know I will have times that I want my will over His will, but I hope that He reminds me that it is better His way. The view He has is like the view from an airplane...He can see everything in front of us, but our view is from a dashboard perspective....all we see is what is right there, we can't see what's coming up. We need to trust the one who see's it all.
Another verse that I just thought of is Psalm 37:4. It says:
"Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart."
I used to think that it meant that you would get what you wanted if you made God happy (almost like doing favors for each other). Scott and I had a discussion (many discussions) about this verse. He did his research and found out that the phrase "delight yourself in the Lord" means something different than we think. It means that we need to make ourselves soft and pliable to God.....like soft clay. Open yourself up to His will and you will get the desires of your heart, because the desires of your heart become God's desires for you. Does that make sense? It didn't to me at first. But I think I get it. Now, I know that doesn't mean that God doesn't like blessing us with things we want or we enjoy. He's like any other father with his children, He has a soft spot for us and likes to bless us. Ok, this turned out to be almost a sermon. I'm sorry about that. I started and I just couldn't stop. Maybe this was God's way of letting me speak to someone who needed it. So if this spoke to you give God the thanks because it was Him who used my fingers to type it.
Lord, Thank you for family, thank you for friends, thank you that we have each other to help us through tough times. Remind me that I can be open and honest with them. I thank you for the blessings that you have given to me so far in my life and I also thank you for the miracles that you have done in my life. I said before that you don't give me miracles, but you do. The first one was actually giving me life, and since then, there have been too many to mention on this blog. I pray for health and safety for Matt and Tanna's baby. Help Tanna with her gallbladder troubles and help the rest of the pregnancy to go well. Help calm her fears as the time draws near for the baby to be born (March/April). Thank you again. I love you!