Update.....again.

Ok, we read her profile. We know that we will go through with it. Now we have to meet her. They wanted us to wait a few days before saying yes (which we will....no doubts at all). We have been told that if we say the word tomorrow or Monday we can meet her as soon as Tuesday evening. I hope that it works out to do that. I can't wait to meet her. We got her letter yesterday when we read the file. I loved the letter and we could sense her excitement. Our only concern is that we won't know how to handle a teenager, but we will take it one day at a time and learn as we go (just as with any parent). Just pray for us that we will move forward as slow or fast as we need to.

THE NEWS!!!

The call came in. We were selected. It is a for sure thing, but they changed a few of the plans we had. We were going to meet her and pick her up tomorrow, but some of the people in the meeting wanted us to go slower, so we are just reading the profile tomorrow and we will set up a meeting sometime after that. It would be nice if we could meet her (and not take her home) and then do the weekend visit another time. But we will talk to her tomorrow and see what can be done. But I can wait until a later time to meet her and bring her home, knowing that we got selected and she will be our daughter. I better go, because I'm now emotionally drained and I might go take a nap or rest. Keep us in your prayers.

Great Song

I don't think I've ever posted like 3 times in one day. I guess it's one way to try and keep my mind busy. But last night I had two girls spend the night (it was a blast) and we downloaded a bunch of songs onto my ipod. One of them was a Rascal Flatts song (I love them) and it is a good song. It can be a love song, a christian song, or tonight as I was driving back from Dighton I realized there is one more way you can take this song. Just think about an adopted mother bringing her child home (like with me and Martaysha) and read the words.


The Day Before You

I had all but given up on finding
The one that I could fall into
On the day before you
I was ready to settle for
Less than love and not much more
Thre was no such things as a dream come true
Oh, but that was all the day before you

Now, you're here and everythings changing
Suddenly life means so much
I can't wait to wake up tomorrow
And find out this promise is true
I will never have to go back to
The day before you

In your eyes I see forever
Makes me wish that my life never knew
The day before you

The Heaven knows the years without you
Shaping my heart for the day I found you
You're the reason for all that I've been through
Then I'm thankful for the day before you

Now you're here and everythings changing
Suddenly life means so much
I can't wait to wake up tomorrow
And find out this promise is true
I will never have to go back to
The day before you

Was the last day that I had to live alone
And I'm never going back
No, I'm never going back

Now you're here and everythings changing
Suddenly life means so much
I can't wait to wake up tomorrow
And find out this promise is true
I would never have to go back to
Yeah, I'll never have to go back to
The day before you

still waiting

Ok, things don't always go just they way you want them too.It's 6:15 and I'm still sitting here at home, going nuts, waiting for the official and final word. I don't think it will be a no, but it's just the waiting. I'm not good at waiting. I've had a few people call this afternoon to see if there is any news, and each time I scream when the phone rings.....but no official news yet. I will be on the phone and then blogging asap after the phone call. Keep praying...and I'll keep you posted.

Staffing today

Well, as I type, they are getting ready to start the meeting. I could find out within the hour about Martaysha. I got an e-mail from our social worker this morning that made me cry (a good crying). I had e-mailed a letter and some pictures for Martaysha to see to calm her nerves. I didn't know if it would work or not, but just read the e-mail to see what happened.

Melissa,
I am sorry that I did not get back to you on this email yesterday. I did meet with Martaysha. I actually went with her to a therapy appointment. That is where she read your letter and seen your pictures. She is now even more excited about the possibility of you being her forever family. The therapist and case manager reported that they have not seen her smile as much as she did yesterday. I spent about an hour with her following her appointment and she admitted that she is more excited then nervous now. She asked when she would get to meet you and explained to her the game plan. She is very nervous about you reading her file and changing your minds about adoption. I (along with everyone else) tried to reassure her on this. Well, I am getting ready to head out for Liberal. If you need to visit with me before the staffing at 2:00pm. I will definitely be calling you after the staffing.

Melva

Martaysha has nothing to worry about. No way at all could I ever not pick her. I'm only reading the profile because they said we have to and it will help me get to know Marty better. I would never not choose to take her home. I already have a heart bursting with love (a miracle from God) and I feel as if she is really my daughter (which sounds so cool to say). I will be back on very soon and I will post the results of the meeting....which I think we already know. I'll be back.

Freaking Out!!!!!!

Ok, it's Monday. That means tomorrow is Tuesday. That's the day they have the staffing. Then since tomorrow is Tuesday, the day after that is Wednesday....the day we meet Martaysha and pick her up for her visit. AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!! Sorry, I am being a little weird today.....the butterflies that have been in my stomach just took over my whole body. They are flying like crazy from my head to my toes. I'm trying to stay focused on what I need to....such as cleaning the house, organizing the bathroom (to fit another female's stuff...poor Scott), and just running around like a chicken with my head cut off. There are two girls from our youth group/band that might be spending the night tonight for one last sleepover before I become a mom. I'm hoping that they can, cause it's gonna get really hard to sleep and just find things to keep my occupied. I can't believe it's two days away. It makes me want to cry. Ok, I know this post is not making much sense and I'm just jabbering on and on....but it's keeping my hands and my mind a little busy. I keep going from room to room trying to get things done and just not remembering what all it is I want to get done. Ok, Melissa, deep breaths, think soothing thoughts, dream of relaxing on the beach by the ocean....the calming sound of the waves.....vacationing with my new daughter....ok, not working. I better just leave now, before everybody decides to quit reading my blog altogether. I will probably be on here again at least once or twice or a million times before Wednesday. So talk to you all later.

Countdown!!!

Well, the countdown continues......and it seems to be taking forever. Is this what it's like when a woman has just a few days before her baby is born? I got the room un-decorated, and now we just wait for Martaysha to come and decorate it in her own way. We have a dresser and an nightstand that I was going to re-paint before she got here....but I decided that maybe she would have fun painting them in her own colors. And since I love to paint things, it can be a mother/daughter project. Maybe we can pick a bunch of different colors and make the drawers on the dresser really colorful. I guess we'll see what she would like to do. I can't believe that we're down to 4 days. I'm getting more excited as the days go by, but my nervousness is growing as well. I guess this is normal. We heard from our social worker that Martaysha is just as excited and nervous as us. So we (I) wrote her a letter to tell her a little more about us and just make that little bit of contact before Wednesday. And the meeting is Tuesday, so when I get the phone call, I will be back on here blogging I assume. It seems so weird to be planning this already when they haven't even had the staffing, but we've been assured that our chances of getting her are 99.9% certain. Our profile was already given out to all those that will be in attendance at the staffing, and they all contacted our social worker and said they were all 100% for us being the adopted parents. And the fact that they told Martaysha about us is a big thing. They wouldn't tell her if they weren't completely certain it was going to happen. wow! We are starting out with a 13 year old......that's just a little weird to me. I just hope we can do this. But I guess if we were able to handle Curtis this past fall, we can handle Martaysha. I'll keep posting all our updates so everyone knows how it all goes.

Update

I can't believe that I get my daughter in a week. It seems like not enough time, but yet, forever at the same time. It's just a dream come true that I will be a mom. Ok, that's all good, but I probably should share how the surgery went (all the gory details...lol). It went good. I've had some cramping, but not bad. If I over-exert myself then I hurt more, but I'm able to do more and more everyday. The dr said that I had an enlarged uterus when she went in (I don't know yet what that could mean), she found a polyp (a growth of tissue), and of course my lining was thicker than it should be. It all went good and they just have to send the tissue in for testing (just to make sure I don't have cancer...scary I know...but it's all good). Other than that I will get to talk to her on August 6th when I go for my follow-up appointment. Scott really likes my dr which is a nice change after my other drs. But anyway, I gotta go. I guess here in a week or so I will have much more to blog about (and her name is Martaysha). I'll keep everyone updated as we go along.

I'm gonna be a Mommy!!!!!

Ok, we have not had the final official word, but we have been assured that it would take a tragedy or a terrible something to make it not happen. We are going to be parents to a 13 year old girl. I'm so excited. I just want to shout it from the rooftops. I've been on the phone all afternoon since getting a call from our social worker, talking to family and letting them know that we are more than likely getting our new family member. They are all just as excited as we are. Scott is getting nervous, but he's handling it well. He just keeps saying it's a good thing we had experience with Curtis last fall. He taught us so much about parenting, about being on the same page, about discipline techniques and how to be creative in that. OH MY GOODNESS!!!! I'm going to be a mommy. Our social worker told me today that all the parties that will be at the meeting to decide for sure have already looked at our profile and they all think that it is a perfect match. So it's just about doing what has to be done in the process. The meeting is the 29th of this month and we are picking her up on the 30th. She will be with us for that weekend (July 30-Aug 3) and then she will go back to her foster family pretty much just to get her stuff. We then will sign adoption intent papers and she will officially move in with us in time to start school on the 15th of August. Then in 6 months later (which will be around Feb....which is my birthday) we will finalize the adoption. Which is interesting. We get her around Scott's birthday and we will finalize around my birthday. Maybe I'm reaching, but that just seems kind of cool to me. And next year we get to celebrate mothers day and fathers day with our child in our home. AAAAAHHHHH!!!!! I feel like I just got news that I'm pregnant. I just hope that the 29th and 30th get her fast. I have my surgery next week, so I will sleep that day away, and other than that I will have cleaning to do and getting the room ready (taking the winnie the pooh stuff down), painting her dresser (it looks horrible right now). Oh my goodness and only a matter of a few weeks to do it. And then we will have to enroll her, get school supplies, school clothes, etc. Wow, I better quit here before I have an anxiety attack....there's a lot to do to get ready to have a teenager......lol. But my excitement is much more than my anxiety at this point. I'M GONNA BE A MOMMY!!!

Lord,
Oh, thank you so much for this blessing in our life. I pray that we would be the parents to her that you want us to be. Guide us in raising her and knowing what choices to make. I pray that she would find you as she lives with us. Let us be the Godly examples that we need to be to our child. I don't even know what to say except "thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you." I give her into your hands right now. She is a gift from you, she is yours and we just have her while on earth. Keep her in your hands and start a work on her now. Let her be molded into what you want her to be molded into. Thank you so much for this opportunity.

Nervous......

I have to start this blog by saying that I am very nervous. No....not about waiting to hear about the girl we might adopt.....but because I have to have surgery now. I am having what's called a D&C. Which means that I get my womanly parts scraped out. It's what they do after a miscarriage to get the rest of the baby out (very gross....sorry). Well, I didn't have a miscarriage, but the other problems I have made this necessary. I'm nervous. The only other time I was put completely out was my senior year when I had my wisdom teeth removed. Thank goodness Scott is very willing to help me out...and my fave sis-in-law said that if I need someone to help me out she would come and stay with me. I will find out about the surgery on the 17th of July (at a pre-op appt.) and then the surgery on the 21st. I should find out the 17th what all happens at the surgery and all the details that I need to know. Maybe I won't be as nervous after I know what will really happen.....or maybe I'll be more nervous when I find out exactly what happens. At least I will have Scott there....and our chances of getting pregnant after this are supposed to be pretty good.....we'll see I guess. I'm not going to guarantee that I will be pregnant, but if it happens I will let you all know. I guess all I can say now is that I want lots of prayers that I won't be so nervous, and that it works. I don't want to spend money on a surgery that won't work for me and things just go back to normal. Well, that's about all I can say about this. Just pray for me on the 21st that the surgery will go well. Thanks so much!