Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Quite a year

I can't believe it's been almost a year since I last posted. I guess I've had a lot going on and not much time to get on the computer. I barely have time to check my e-mail.
Well, my husband and I still don't have a baby. We can see now why God hasn't given us one, but it's still so hard. In April, cancer was found in my husband's eye and we've been doing treatments and surgeries since then, 4 rounds of chemo drops and 3 surgeries. It was thought to have been cleared up in May, after the first 2 surgeries, but 6 weeks later it showed up again. But the second time the Dr. sent us to Oklahoma City to see someone who has worked with this type of cancer. That was when we did the chemo drops. He had another surgery October 20th and right now we are waiting on some more biopsy reports, but we'll find out about them on Thursday of this week (9th). We're hoping that maybe we won't have to go back to Oklahoma City as often as we have been (every two weeks). It's just a pain to drive there every two weeks (it's 6 hours from here to OKC).
Even through all that, we would still love to have a baby. Sometimes I get so discouraged. I've even been mad at God a little bit for not giving me what I want (how selfish.....what a spoiled brat I am). It seems like every time I turn around someone else I know is having a baby. My brother just got married this summer (2 months after graduating from high school) now he and his wife are having a baby in April. Last year at this time my best friend was pregnant and so was another of my sis-in-laws. My friend had her baby this past March and my sis-in-law had hers in April (hard month, I was due in April). Now it's like dejavou (sp?).
God has given me a couple of verses to hold on to while I wait for His perfect timing on a baby.

"He settles the barren woman in her home as a happy mother of children"
Psalm 113:9

"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see."
Hebrews 11:1

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose."
Romans 8:28

I hope these verses speak to you in some way. Even if you aren't going through what we are going through. Remember God loves you! (I even have to remind myself)

Lord, I pray that your will be done in our situation. Help me be content where you have us at now. I pray that I can be an encouragement to others going through rough times. Thank you so much for the blessings that you have given to us. Give us strength to go on when we would like to give up. And Lord, I would like to ask for healing in Scott's eye. Please get rid of all the cancer and keep it from coming back. Thank you so much.

1 comment:

Andrea S. said...

Hey girl! I know that God will bless you with a child in His own time. Any child who gets to call you "mommy" will be blessed! Even if you choose to become mommy to a child that doesn't have one. I know you know that God knows what is best for us. It is all in his plan. It can be almost impossible to understand why a loving god such as ours would put us through some of the things we must endure but He knows best. I have to remind myself of that all the time. Keep the faith that God will get you through this and will bless you in ways you can't imagine. He wont give us anything we can't handle! Thank you for sharring such an personal thing with me! I will continue to pray for Scott and your entire situation that God's will be done. God bless and please keep me posted on everything! Love ya always!
Andrea Schadel