Sunday, March 01, 2009
Vitamin B and other things
Vitamin B works if you suffer from depression. I have now been on it for awhile (I can't even remember exactly how long) but I had an opportunity to get really down on myself yesterday. Actually I was really upset and felt bad about me, but I did not stay down for long. Today I am feeling fine and the extreme did not go as low as it could have. I am physically feeling better and so now mentally I am getting better too. I think a person always tends to feel down when they are sick...cause they just want to get better. I have also made a decision. I am going to blog a letter to my "Angel Baby", Kory Allan. It will be my own personal memorial service to him and then I can move on. I wasn't going to say anything, and only those of you who read this will know (I did tell my sis-in-law and my mom...of course), but this is a prayer request only. I am not giving any false hope that a miracle will for sure take place, but I want lots of prayer for making this decison and that if we do that it could possibly work. But Scott and I have been talking and he wants me to try Clomid. For those of you who don't know what that is, I have probably talked about it in other blogs...a long while ago. But it's a drug that is supposed to make me ovulate, we will know for sure when it is supposed to happen and then we can try to get pregnant just one last time. I am excited that Scott is ready to take this step, but I'm scared to death to even possibly get my hopes up. Because I don't think my only problem is getting pregnant, it's keeping the baby. I go to the dr about this on March 11 and we will discuss whether or not this option will even work for us or if we do it, maybe I have to take some kind of hormone (shot or pill). But after the miscarriage in February, I do get nervous about really trying again. Ok, maybe we are crazy for trying to get pregant after just getting Marti, but God will know what we need to do. Also, with my womanly problems, I really think that we don't have as much time to work with that some women do when trying to have kids. I don't think my woman parts will last as long as they should. Anyway, for the moment just be praying that we make the decison that God wants us to make. Even if it means giving it up and not trying it. If we decide to do it, then it becomes a prayer that it will work and that we don't get upset over it if it doesn't work. Ok, for now that is all I think. It turned out to be a longer post than I expected, but at least it's not all venting about how life stinks. I think it is a normal post from a girl who's getting back to normal. God Bless you all!!!